Single File
It’s strange some of the things you miss.
Like lines.
Not the parallel or squiggly sort, but the ones where you stand behind someone else, single-file-like.
Most of the time, the chaotic queues at the grocery store or ATM or mobile phone shop or wherever goods are sold don’t really bother me. I’m usually prepared to stand my ground and fight my way to the front.
After all, non-existent line etiquette is nothing unique to Angola: China, Guatemala, Peru … even in Germany you’d have to elbow the occasional blue-hair1 who’s trying to snake your spot.
But sometimes—like at eight o’clock on a Monday morning when your coffee hasn’t really kicked in and you just want to pay for a simple internet recharge card—you don’t feel like indulging the battle royale.
You long for days when you could just patiently wait your turn in silence. When you had the luxury of staring blankly at that jackass in the self-checkout line who is taking FOREVER because he has a bunch of fruit and vegetables and booze that require help from the lone worker who is off getting some other yahoo a pack of cigarettes. When you could zombie your way to the next counter, pay the fruit-booze-vegetable guy a dirty look,2 swipe your card and get the hell out of there.
Sometimes, the battle royale can kiss my ass.
Next!
On the bright side, you don’t have to endure the anxiety of wondering if you have picked the fastest line at Safeway, or being in the fast line right up to the point that the little old lady in front of you goes from one credit card to the other, then to cash, and finally to a check, all the while the super friendly check out person is distracting her by asking her one dumb thing after another.
Justin..I do remember being brave with my attitude in those lines in Germany.
You should write a book, yaknow? You make the reader feel what you are feeling.
Till the next one,
Love love,
your mutti